Steps in Conflict Resolution Process

Steps in Conflict Resolution Process Gina Bonham Lee Holmes ABtech Conflict Resolution Project Conflict is a characteristic of human existence. It is part of the dynamic of life that drives us into the future. But it needs to be managed constructively. When associated with violence, destruction and killing, it is no longer a healthy part of life. Violent conflict solves few problems, creates many, and breeds more unhealthy conflict to come. Conflict has characteristics of its own, and it is possible to analyze its structure and behavior. When conflict is understood, it’s easier to find ways to predict it, prevent it, transform it, and resolve it. Sarah and Desidra have lived together harmoniously for a year. One day, Desidra brings home a new puppy, and Sarah is upset because she does not want to deal with the care of or mess from this new animal. Sarah decides to approach Desidra about the problem. Desidra has brought this puppy home and Sarah doesn’t want to have anything to do with the care of or having to clean up the mess that the puppy will bring. Sarah has decided to approach Desidra about the problem in hopes to work this out. What will happen is yet to be determined. Sarah and Desidra have lived together harmoniously for a year. The stage of their relationship is one that can be classified as being in the intensifying stage. Desidra will test Sarah to the potential of their relationship with various degrees of self-disclosure to see if that will be reciprocated and to test the impressions that she may make. Relationships grow and self-disclosure becomes more apparent and deep. There are no set guidelines for every relationship in the intensifying stage. Every relationship possesses unique characteristics that maybe difficult to actually predict if efforts further the relationship will succeed or fail. Sarah and Desidra are dealing with complementary conflict styles. They each have opposite point of views. The symmetrical conflict style is where the two individuals mirror each other’s behavior. Sarah does not want to have anything to do with the new puppy. Desidra wants the new puppy and seems to think that Sarah will be okay with it. Sarah seems to have the more dominant power over Desidra. She is not happy with Desidra bringing home a new puppy and she decides to approach Desidra about the problem. Desidra thinks that everything will be okay between the two of them and that Sarah will love the puppy and want to help take care of it. The conflict that may arise between Sarah and Desidra we can use the Filley Model for conflict resolution. First we can look at the antecedent conditions, perceived and/ or felt conflict, manifest behavior, conflict resolution or suppression, and resolution aftermath. The big picture would be for Sarah doesn’t want anything to do with a new puppy. Desidra will have all responsibility to do whatever needs to be done to keep the dog. Desidra will be accounted for if anything goes wrong in regards to the dog. The conflict would not be substantive. This would mean that it would be so much more than just the essential conflict with no resolution in sight. The Pillow method is a situation that has four sides to it like a pillow. The first position states I’m right and you’re wrong. Position two states your right I’m wrong. Position three states that both right both wrong. The fourth position states that this issue isn’t as important as it seems. Yes, Sarah and Desidra could use the Pillow Method to adjust the perception of the conflict. For Sarah and Desidra to come to some kind of agreement will be to create a win-win situation. First Sarah and Desidra will need to identify the problem. Have a discussion to understand both sides of the problem. The goal at this initial stage is to identify what you want and listen to what the other person wants. Define the things that you both agree on, as well as the ideas that have caused the disagreement. It is important to listen actively to what the other is saying. Come up this several possible solutions. His is the brainstorming phase. Drawing on the points that you both agree on and your shared goals generate a list of as many ideas as you can for solving the problem. Evaluate these alternative solutions. Now go through the alternative solutions to the problem, one by one. Consider the pros and cons of the remaining solutions until the list is narrowed down to one or two of the best ways of handling the problem. It is important for each person to be honest in this phase. The solutions might not be ideal for either person and may involve compromise. Decide on the best solution. Select the solution that seems mutually acceptable, even if it is not perfect for either party. As long as it seems fair and there is a mutual commitment to work with the decision, the conflict has a chance for resolution. Implement the solution. It is important to agree on the details of what each person must do, who is responsible for implementing various parts of the agreement, and what to do in case the agreement starts to break down. Continue to evaluate the solution. Conflict resolutions should be seen as works in progress. Make it a point to ask the other person from time to time how things are going. Something unexpected might have come up or some aspect of the problem may have been overlooked. Your decisions should be seen as open to revision, as long as the revisions are agreed upon mutually. Between Sarah and Desidra the parts of the plan of action that may seem difficult would be to decide the best solution and to implement it between the two of them. Sarah’s decision would be not to have the puppy at all were as on the other hand Desidra’s decision would be to what seems fair and the decision is mutual. The consequences for a win-lose outcome would be that Sarah values her point more than their friendship. Sarah would have the power because it would be to defeat Desidra to get what she wants. This would be to Sarah’s advantage because it’s her way or no way. The consequences for a lose-win outcome would be that Sarah values their friendship more than this point. This is known as accommodating which occurs when you allow others to have their way rather than asserting your own point of view. Sarah could end up having high concerns for Desidra about the new puppy which results in a lose-win situation. The consequences for lose-lose outcome would be that Sarah could just avoid the whole problem. Avoiding occurs when people nonassertively ignore or stay away from conflict. Sarah has an attitude about Desidra bringing home a new puppy and believes that there is no good way to resolve the issue at hand. The consequences of compromise outcome would be that Sarah thinks that this is not important enough to fight about and she doesn’t want to be unreasonable. If Sarah lets Desidra bring home a new puppy then maybe she’ll give me something else. We could both live with that. Compromising is sometimes touted as an effective way to handle conflicts. On a personal note, the call schedule that we have at the facility where I work. Each month we have to sign up to be on call if needed in the OR. Some days you think that your schedule is fine and then a wrench gets thrown in. Other changes have to be made which may cause a conflict with others. Fellow co-workers have already gotten there schedule and know when their day is accounted for. But there may come times that you may have to help pull someone’s call just to help out. At times it’s not that easy but you give in because you care about that patient and to do what is right.

Love in Like Water for Chocolate Essay

Have you ever experienced that euphoric sensation after eating an absolutely delicious food? You are not alone. Many have experienced this feeling and refer to it as a â€Å"foodgasm†. These types of connections between food and sex have long been established, but from where do they come? Do we make these connections through our cultural experiences or are they biologically programmed within us? In Like Water for Chocolate, the author, Laura Esquivel, portrays sex and food as being connected in a cultural sense. The basis for this conclusion rests largely in her use of tradition and her depiction of a Latino family strongly based in their culture. This cultural foundation, paired with the interactions between characters, food, and sex, gives the reader plenty of evidence to support this perspective. Esquivel uses the preparation, eating, and serving of food as a connection to love and sex, and as humans we have learned, through culture, to make this connection. Structured in twelve chapters, each representing a month of the year, Esquivel has created an entrancing love story that is sprinkled with culinary enchantments around every corner. Each chapter is prefaced with a recipe that is relevant to the progression of the novel, not to mention the many cooking tid-bits thrown in throughout each chapter. The preparation of food is clearly very important to the culture being represented. Tita, the main character and protagonist, was born in the kitchen and possesses all the superior traits of a culinary expert. She is also blessed (or cursed) with the ability to inject her emotions in to the food she cooks, in turn, infecting all those who consume the food with that emotion. In one section of the novel, Tita makes Quail, in Rose Petal Sauce, to express her passion for her sister, Rasaura’s, husband, Pedro, who she is deeply in love with. With that meal it seemed they had discovered a new system of communication, in which Tita was the transmitter, Pedro the receiver†¦ Pedro didn’t offer any resistance. He let Tita penetrate to the farthest corners of his being, and all the while they couldn’t take their eyes off each other. (Esquivel 52) It is customary, in many cultures, for a woman to prepare a meal for her significant other in order to show how much she cares for him. The fact that Tita has taken the time to cook such a complex and beautiful dish, to translate her love to Pedro, shows how much impact this cultural custom has on her. Through this particular interaction, Esquivel has displayed the influence that culture has over the preparation of food and it’s relation to love. The expectation for a woman to acquire the ability to prepare food for her significant other brings me to another question: Does a woman’s capacity for cooking significantly affect a man’s attraction to her? Esquivel brings this question to the forefront of the reader’s mind when she offers this comparison between Rasaura and Tita’s cooking. The rice was obviously scorched, the meat dried out, the dessert burnt. But no one at the table dared display the tiniest hint of displeasure, not after Mama Elena had pointedly remarked: ‘As the first meal that Rosaura has cooked it isn’t bad. Don’t you agree, Pedro? ’ Making a real effort not to insult his wife, Pedro replied: ‘No, for her first time it’s not too bad. ’ (50-51) She goes on to show Pedro’s reaction to Tita’s cooking saying, â€Å"It wasn’t enough he’d made his wife jealous earlier, for when Pedro tasted his first mouthful, he couldn’t help closing his eyes in voluptuous delight and exclaiming: ‘It is a dish for the gods! ’†(51). This comparison allows us to reasonably assume that Tita’s aptitude for culinary artistry did contribute to the growth of Pedro’s love. So, how might this reaction be culturally habituated? In almost all cultures, men are expected to provide and women are expected to cook. Even if a man is not consciously aware, they subconsciously factor this in to their choosing of a mate. It is culturally conditioned for a man to prioritize supporting his family over many other things. If a woman does not possess the ability to cook then a man may assume that she will not be able to support or provide for their family. This, of course, is not a strict rule of thought but, from my experience, it can be applied to many cases. Through comparison, Esquivel gives the reader evidence that Pedro loves Tita partially for her ability in the kitchen, and with prior knowledge we, as the reader, can attribute this connection to his cultural influences. We’ve determined that falling in love can be related to a woman’s ability to make food, but what about the relationship between food and making love? Earlier I made a reference to the word â€Å"foodgasm†, this portion of a quote, which I previously used, provides a great example of what a foodgasm might look like. â€Å"†¦ for when Pedro tasted his first mouthful, he couldn’t help closing his eyes in voluptuous delight and exclaiming: ‘It is a dish for the gods! ’†(Esquivel 51) It is instances like this one that finds Esquivel nudging the reader to make a connection between food and sex. Esquivel’s use of diction such as ‘voluptuous’ makes it practically impossible not to connect this experience to the effects of an orgasm. Thinking further on this connection, I think that giving food is a form of showing love just as making love is. As raunchy as it may seem, Pedro is receiving Tita through food. It is their unique form of making love. Esquivel makes another food/love connection on page 67 when she says, â€Å"Tita knew through her own flesh how fire transforms a tortilla, how a soul that hasn’t been warmed by the fire of love is lifeless, like a useless ball of corn flour. †(67) It’s almost as if Esquivel allows characters, in this case Tita, to take on the form of food. With this being said, receiving food is like receiving the person who made it. In Tita and Pedro’s case, it was their way of making love before they could actually perform the act. I think that the importance of food to their relationship can be contributed to their culture’s emphasis on food. If food were not so important to their culture it would not be the medium for such an important interaction. In order to make and express love in Like Water for Chocolate, Tita makes food for Pedro further emphasizing the cultural connection between food and love. Some may argue that this relationship between food and sex is purely natural and scientific. In some sense this is true. Sex and Food are both biologically programmed drives that all humans possess. We have a strong need to procreate in order to further our species as well as a great need to eat in order to survive. These are facts of nature, but you can’t ignore the emotional connection that we have to food and sex. Tita and Pedro do not have these reactions to food in relation to sex simply because they need to eat or they have a great need to reproduce. Culture conditions us to eat because we love food not to simply eat to live. The same goes for sex. We are taught that in order to have sex one must have a connection to their partner; it is â€Å"morally sound† to think this way. This is especially true for the culture being represented in Like Water for Chocolate. Just in the way that Esquivel structures the novel you can get a sense of the importance food. The food must be treated with respect and love just as a person should be. Esquivel shows the significance of treating food well here: Something strange was going on. Tita remembered that Nacha had always said that when people argue while preparing tamales, the tamales won’t get cooked. They can be heated day after day and still stay raw, because the tamales are angry. In a case like that, you have to sing to them, which makes them happy; then they’ll cook. ‘(218-219) Esquivel’s personification of food demonstrates the meaning that food holds in this culture. It has feelings and you have to love it and nurture it. You don’t just eat food to eat it; you eat food because food is a beautiful part of life that you respect. In this way, Esquivel creates a strong connection between food and love through the cultural importance that the novel puts on the meaning of food rather than the natural tendency of humans to make this connection. After analyzing Esquivel’s novel, Like Water for Chocolate, I can say that the connection between food, sex, and love, in this context, is predominately based on cultural influences rather than natural ones. In making food, one is showing how much they care, just as Tita did for Pedro with her Quale in Rose pedal sauce dish. The ability to create such meals, in a man’s mind, is a reflection on a woman’s ability to provide for their family. By personifying food, Esquivel allows this process of cooking food and giving food to become much deeper than the simple act itself. The act of giving food then takes the form of giving ones self to the individual receiving the food. Whether it is between food and love, cooking and falling in love, or eating food and making love, culture is the force that defines these connections. Works Cited Esquivel, Laura. Like Water for Chocolate. Trans. Carol Christensen and Thomas Christensen. 1st ed. New York: Doubleday, 1992. Print.

Learn the Spanish-language Version of O Christmas Tree

Below is a Spanish-language version of O Tannenbaum, a famous  German Christmas carol more formally known in English as O Christmas Tree. After exploring the translated lyrics, learn how the word order changes for poetry in Spanish, along with additional vocabulary and grammar notes for the translation. These notes will better explain how phrases and terms change in translation from German to Spanish, plus how the definition of the word can transform itself into the Spanish language. Review the lyrics of  Quà © Verdes Son below and then learn about the difference between hoja, brillar,  airosas, and other words and phrases within the song. Qu verdes son Quà © verdes son, quà © verdes sonlas hojas del abeto.Quà © verdes son, quà © verdes sonlas hojas del abeto.En Navidad quà © hermoso està ¡con su brillar de luces mil.Quà © verdes son, quà © verdes sonlas hojas del abeto. Quà © verdes son, quà © verdes sonlas hojas del abeto.Quà © verdes son, quà © verdes sonlas hojas del abeto.Sus ramas siempre airosas son,su aroma es encantador.Quà © verdes son, quà © verdes sonlas hojas del abeto. Translation of the Spanish Lyrics How green are, how green arethe needles of the fir tree.How green are, how green arethe needles of the fir tree.At Christmas how beautiful you arewith your glittering of a thousand lights.How green are, how green arethe needles of the fir tree. How green are, how green arethe needles of the fir tree.How green are, how green arethe needles of the fir tree.Your branches always elegant are,your aroma is enchanting.How green are, how green arethe needles of the fir tree. Vocabulary, Grammar and Translation Notes An unusual word order is used throughout the lyrics in the  Quà © verdes son  song for poetic purposes, and so the lyrics tend to go well with the music.The phrase typically used to refer to a Christmas tree is à ¡rbol de Navidad. Although these lyrics do not specifically refer to a Christmas tree, neither do those of the original German carol.Hoja is normally translated as leaf, but needles is used in this song because that is what the leaves of a fir tree are typically called. Hoja can also be used to refer to a sheet of paper or a sheet of metal.Brillar is a verb usually meaning to shine, to glitter, or to be conspicuous. The infinitive form here, like other infinitives, can be used as a noun. In nonpoetic use of the language, the noun brillantez would be more likely here.Airosas could have been translated more literally as airy.Note that the word  aroma, like many other words of Greek origin ending in -a, is masculine.

Jonathan Swift Satire Analysis - 1108 Words

omparing Irony In both Mark Twain and Jonathan Swift’s articles there is an effective use of irony. Irony in satirical writing is normally used for the speaker to convey the opposite intended meaning to which they are stating; along with antiphrasis, the use of a word when the opposite meaning is implied, irony makes a valuable asset to satirical literature. The sarcastic use of irony was input to both readings to express the writer’s disappointment towards their societies teachings during their era’s. The use of antiphrasis and parody go hand in hand with irony, they allow for a clear comparison between Mark Twain’s â€Å"Advice to Youth† and Jonathan Swift’s â€Å"A Modest Proposal†. Using deception through their words, the writers manage to use†¦show more content†¦Twain also targets authorities and didactics as a whole with this speech, by critiquing the use and effectiveness of them through parody. â€Å"A Modest Proposal† captur es the attention and the trust of the reader by sounding honest and intellectual. Swift makes it seem as if he is using an academic analysis, comparing numbers of poverty, working out mathematical equations to depict what poverty will increase to, and analyzing that there is no better way to work around it except for the solution he has come up with. A modest proposal uses irony by expressing the solution of eating babies as something that must happen. Together the sense of urgency and the hopeful buildup give the readers the perception of an authentic actuality towards Swift’s provided ‘quick fix’ to the problem at hand. 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